Ugh, feeling sad .. not much to be done about that .. i'm feeling sad about Jon, about the man who was easy to love, the joyful loving man ..  and i'm feeling sad about the hard and nasty man he was too. I feel sad that the he'll never feel sunshine warm the back of his neck again. 
Actually the sadness is overwhelming this week and has taken me aback because i began the year with a mind to be strong but my heart is faced the other way, so i am having to step back and accept that i'm still broken up and fragile. 
I have been in my studio making work of little consequence in the hope that working will act as salve - it does a little - but as my heart is a raw mess a little salve goes only a little way.